When Fear Rules !

First Book : Loved to Death

Loved to Death: Chapter 13 Another Witness Silence by Fear

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

“ Coach, it’s Mary.  I just had another session with Meagan. She is really being very open with me, but is still very fragile. I feel she is being honest with me regarding her father, but has become so dependent on him, so vulnerable to his games, that I have my doubts as to whether she can really survive in the real world. She refuses to press charges for attempted rape by her father, so my hands are tied there. With her mother seemingly so damaged by her relationship with Meagan’ s father, and the degree to which Meagan has been isolated from any other support system, I sadly have my doubts. He calls her damaged goods because of the campus rape, but he has done such damage by nursing her dependency on him.  I have my doubts as to whether she has the inner strength to truly escape her father’s grasp. I have not had experience with this type of sociopathy or to this degree of manipulation. He seems to have no limits or boundaries, yes, as you have said, no conscience…at all ! “

“ Mary, it is an eye opener for many that people like this do live among us, especially that they may be a parent. And I can appreciate your doubts. My hopes were to eventually get her strong enough that she will be willing to move with family that are far enough away and strong enough to portray a more healthy home, but thus far, it seems as though any healthy family members moved away to escape Lucius as they saw something uncomfortable going on in the family and did not want to be a part of it. But I am still searching for options.”

“ Well, Coach. at least you have her out of the house and with her Uncle and Aunt, that has to offer some support !”

“ I am not sure what degree they can be supportive. I am finding that the more I talk to them, the more they are fearful and somewhat paralyzed in any of their dealings with Lucius. They did not disclose issues or serious concerns when we first talked and I did not have the luxury of a lot of choices at the time.”

“ Coach, I have to go, my boss is at my door and wants to see me. I just had to tell you that she is trying, comes for appointments and shares but I still have my doubts.”

Damn, I need Mary on board with me. It is not a strong enough support system to challenge Lucius yet, but Mary appears to be someone I can trust if I can get on board. Within twenty minutes Mary called me again…

“ Mr. Julius, my boss,  just came in and fired me for not keeping up with my Electronic Records for Meagan and not having signed permission to talk with you in relationship to her. I am in shock, just stood there and broke into a sweat, got very light-headed. Thought I was going to pass out. But then said that I had all my notes regarding Meagan  recorded into our Electronic Health Records  and had the permission form signed  and imported into the Records and had a copy in my personal file. I told him I just had a session with her this morning and finished her note and signed it. He would not listen to anything I said, but was sweating really bad. But when he said  he was going to talk to the Counseling Board to see if they will suspend my  Counseling License, I could not say a word. This is my career, my life. I love this work and I am good at it !  I weakened and showed some tears, as he said to clean out  my desk, that my clients would be transferred to other therapists. I am numb, and scared.  I know that Meagan’s father had everything to do with this.”

“ Mary, please go check your records ! If you can, call me back please  !

“ Wait, I am doing that right now. My other clients are there but Meagan’s records are not. They are totally erased. And my personal file on her is gone to !”

“ Think Mary,  who can erase records from the Electronic Records once that record is signed by the therapist ? “

“ Well…..I can’t even totally erase  a record and signed note on a client. It leaves a permanent footprint which says this file has been deleted with a date stamp. “

“ Who would potentially be able to “totally delete” a file , Mary.”

“ Only the Administrator has access to my electronic files. Oh my God, Mr. Julius, who hides in his office all day, doesn’t say more than five words a day to any of us, he deleted all of Meagan’s files, blamed me and just fired me. ”

“ And why would he do that Mary ?”

“ To get rid of me, he does not need a reason to fire me. Or, Coach, if he was forced to do it by someone like Meagan’s father. Getting me fired means that Lucius has won again, he controls Meagan’s therapy again ! I cannot deal with this ugliness Coach. I am going home for Thanksgiving. I have to think about my next step. My next step ? I was just fired from my first counselor job and if I lose my license, I’m screwed !!! “

“ Don’t be so sure of that Mary ! I am really sorry you are going through this and I feel some responsibility.  I have been gathering info to stop Lucius, and I could use someone like you on my team. In the meantime, you might want to look at options, seriously.

First, you could march right back in there and  tell your boss you want to have this investigated because only he can “totally delete” a record. He may fire you for any reason, and you would not want to work for such a boss anyway. But, he could lose his job and license if he tampered with Meagan’s records and tries to fire you for that. And tell him he can do what he wants, but if he attempts to take your license, which I do not believe he can, you and I will file a law suite against him, the Counseling Department  and the University. We will expose him ! You, in the meantime, will submit your resignation, so that you can devote your time to uncovering what is really going on. I think he will break into a sweat  and have a panic attack.

Secondly, you can say you are investigating whether  Meagan’s father had anything to do with this firing and if so, that will bring the option of another, very significant level of law suite against him, the Department and the University. You and I KNOW Lucius is behind this.”

“Coach, you are right, I believe what you are saying, but I do not know if I can do this !”

 “ If you could go toe-to-toe with your boss, it will certainly put some fear in him and he will most likely do nothing to effect your license as long as you are gone. I would ask for a positive letter of recommendation.

Then you could look for another position elsewhere, and if you are willing to move to Ohio, I can promise you a position with my  practice. You would fit in very well, and it is a very friendly atmosphere. You would be very successful, I promise you.

All the while you could continue to work with Meagan, even over the phone, as she can afford to pay you and would want to continue.”

“ Coach, I don’t know if I want to deal with this. It has been an overwhelming day for me. Damn, what am I saying ? I have to stand up for myself and Meagan. Thank you for the suggestions, now I have to do it ! But I will keep you posted. And I appreciate the job offer, that gives me strength.“

“ Mary, could you still talk with Meagan by phone so she does not feel abandoned just saying you are taking a break to be with your family for personal reasons.?”

“  Coach, I will certainly do all I can ! I cannot abandon her because of my jerk of a boss and her sociopathic father. I could not look myself  in the mirror. And I am a good therapist.”

“ Mary, please stay in touch. You are a good therapist, I could use your services at my office, and on my team for Meagan. But before  we end this conversation, is there anything else you can tell me about your boss ?”

“ Sorry Coach, I don’t know him well and the staff keeps to themselves. I know know that he is a creep and a weak person. I guess the only thing I have heard is that he may be bi-sexual or gay, which is no crime in my book. And I heard the secretaries joking once about him being a member of this ‘Men Only Club’ downtown. So, no nothing much as he is a very private person mostly. ”

“ That is interesting ! I have been talking to Meagan’s Uncle where she is living now, and both Meagan and Uncle Larry mentioned that the only place that Lucius seems to go without Meagan when he is not at work is the Men Only Club downtown. Chew on that and give me your thoughts when you can take a breath. I think if we put pieces together among those who are offering support to Meagan, we can make a case. I smell a rat ! I am contacting an attorney I have consulted with other cases of abusive behavior towards my clients, but I would like an attorney that lives and works in Meagan’s area ! ”

“ Coach, that does make sense ! Let me get back to you later. I have to call my parents and tell them what has happened. Then I will go in to see my former boss and watch him sweat.”

It is critical that I do not not lose the best potential support person Meagan has at this time.  I understand Mary’s fears.  No one wants to confront a sociopath for fear of becoming another victim, or of being further targeted. But that is what makes them a potential victim, fear and avoidance ! I do not think I can trust Larry or Ann, so Mary is that much more critical.  I will stay with it, but what power do I have when I am so far away ? Only chance I have is to wait for  Lucius to feel so empowered that we are helpless, that he leaves a trail we can use against him.

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Loved to Death : Chapter 14 Thanksgiving that wasn’t !

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

“ Meagan, how are you doing ? I understand you have seen Mary a few times now, “

” Coach, I am really comfortable with her. At least I have the two of you who believe me ! She called me and is taking a vacation with her family in Florida for Thanksgiving,  so I won’t talk to her until she gets back. But Coach, I have another problem. My parents want to come to my Uncle and Aunt’s home tomorrow for Thanksgiving !

I  do not really want to see either one of them. It has been so peaceful without them around, but my Uncle said that they are the only family we have around and that Lucius knows the rules.  Uncle Larry said that I should stay close to him or Aunt Ann and they will protect me. They think he won’t try anything if I stay close to them. ”

“ Meagan,  my immediate reaction is hell no ! I do not trust Lucius or then again your mother. Your father, excuse me, Lucius has proven to you and me that he cannot be trusted. He is a very sick man. I do not understand how your Uncle and Aunt could even think of entertaining them with all that has happened. But in the end, it is up to you, your Aunt and Uncle.  I will talk to your Uncle about it though. I would rather you go to stay with a friend for the day.”

“ Coach, I would too, but I have no friends left that I can trust. Daddy, I mean Lucius, has made friends with the few friends I had, actually the one, and she does not call me back or seem to want anything to do with me anymore. ”

“ Meagan, I have told you before that your Lucius would try to separate you from anyone one who would be  a possible support  person, anyone who would believe you. Remember, you have me and Mary, and we know the truth. When we are done , many more will be on your side. You will not be alone !”

“Coach, maybe it is best that I stay here, since there is nowhere else I can think of to go. I will stay close to Uncle Larry. He is bigger than Lucius, so he can protect me.  Coach, how could I have been so blind for all these years ? I know we have talked about it over and over, but it is just so much !”

“You loved the person who you thought was your father, but not Lucius.  Sadly, there are many fake people out there who can take advantage of real caring and loving people. Just think about your capacity to love. I want you to focus on you, all that you can do with your life, all the good in you. Find something you love to do with your life to make a difference…and you will !  Then eventually you will meet people who appreciate you for who you are and what you do, instead  of pretending to care for some private agenda.

I will talk to your Uncle to ask him to help you keep a distance from Lucius.”

“Thank you Coach and Happy Thanksgiving ! I am thankful for having you and Mary in my life now.”

It gave me temporary relief  hearing that last response from Meagan, but I certainly did not think we were anywhere near a safe place with her especially while dealing with her sociopathic father.  Larry and Ann are trying their best, but fear rules their lives.

I did not tell Meagan about Mary being fired, that would just be too much for her to deal with and I am hoping Mary will decide to continue to counsel with Meagan, even if over the phone or computer. I was actually uncomfortably surprised that we had heard relatively little in the way of negative response from Lucius since Meagan moved out of the home and was living with Larry and Ann, but I knew there was more to come. I  felt Lucius was going underground to subvert our attempts to help his daughter. He had set up phony therapy with “Red” with very harmful results, and he had most likely pulled some stunt by either using some threat or blackmail to have Mary fired as her meetings with Meagan were successful.  He needed to eliminate any chance of his daughter being believed. I am looking for ways to expose Lucius but need more assistance and support. I do not trust that Larry or Ann are strong enough to deal with Lucius. 

I tried to call Larry and Ann about being especially on guard a few times, and finally reached Larry.

“ Larry, I am not feeling good about Lucius and Becky coming over for Thanksgiving….”

“ Coach, coach, coach….I have this covered. Meagan is to stay by my side or sit with her Aunt Ann the whole time. Her old Uncle Larry will protect her, not to worry ! It has been weeks and Lucius has not been a problem. I think he has learned his lesson.”

“ Larry, I think you are still being naive , but I  have no control over what you decide to do. Please do not underestimate your brother’s evilness again. ”

What I did not realize until later is that while I was talking to Larry, Meagan was reading a letter she had just received from Lucius. Of course,  he would deny it and the return address was fictitious, but this was just  another attempt  to take her down. Who would do this ? She did not share the note with Uncle Larry and Aunt Ann because she felt they wouldn’t believe it was from her father who , regardless of what has happened, they still want to believe he loves her so much. More importantly, the more evil Lucius is, the less people like Larry and Ann want to deal with  it and want to avoid  reality because it seems so unbelievably dark and ugly. Then there is also the fear of becoming even more of a target themselves.

***A Word of Caution : The following is the graphic and disgusting, but very revealing letter that Meagan received from her father which I did not see until a few days after Thanksgiving. Meagan’s darkest hour was upon her, which led to an irreversible turning point in her life.

The Letter  from Daddy

“ Dear M,

I so want to see you. I want to hold you tightly and undress you. Even as you quiver, I want to hold you close and strip you down until you are totally naked.

I want you to feel my hands as they touch your lips and chin, slowly your neck, and finally your breast. Those precious small nipples in my fingers. I want to hold my hand around your back as you struggle to free yourself, pretending you are not enjoying every thought. I want to lay down and roam your body freely as you lay motionless beneath me.

As my lips kiss every blessed spot and linger on your nipples, sucking the very life out of them, and feeling your wetness, which betrays your cries of NO !

I want to finger you and have you feel the presence of my hands controlling your every sexual response.

I want to feel your heart race, your body cry out in ecstasy and fear. I want you to be so wet with desire that when I go down on you that you feel urges never known to your body. 

I want you to have nothing left to do but to give yourself up to me.

I want your small virgin mouth to take me in deep and find pleasure in every ounce. As you have me swallowed up deep in your throat, I want to eat you out and have you unable to  move and avoid the pleasure of being a full woman. 

I promise you I will not hurt you as I enter your darkest spot. It will ONLY PLEASE ME MORE IF YOU FIGHT ME AND CAUSE ME TO HAVE TO SILENCE YOU.

M, my beloved sexual temptation, I can have you anywhere anytime I want. You are owned by me. I would have FREELY given you to a man for your husband to enjoy these things, but since YOU HAVE BEEN DEFILED, what man would want you ?

I do not want you to be deprived of these marvelous sensations and pleasures, so I will give them to you anytime I want.

I do know that you will give this to other men in your life and they will most likely feel compelled  to keep me away from you. But, M, you will always remember the times we have shared and you will always remember the things you felt and you will forever be mine. As you read this, I am sure you have found yourself wet with desire. Good, I do not ever want you to forget what I have written here, and I want you to think of this every time you let another man kiss you. 

With  All  My Pleasure and Love. “

Of course, Lucius would deny any of this. No one saw the note until the day after Thanksgiving, and when Larry  sent a copy of it to me, and then shared the darkest news he could deliver. I thought the world had already ended for Meagan.

So, Meagan, after hiding the note under her pillow, came cautiously out of her bedroom the next morning for Thanksgiving. Her parents arrived and her father with a wide  grin said his greetings to all, but did not approach Meagan who was partially standing behind Larry and Ann. Her mother Becky , with a zombie like appearance according to Ann, threw Meagan’s Birth Certificate at Meagan’s feet that was blood stained and coldly said, “ Oh, do I know you ? I once had a daughter who looked just like you”,  and then made her way towards the makeshift bar next to the kitchen. Her mother did not to say a word for the rest of the day and early evening, while remaining at the bar during dinner. 

After dinner and small talk, Larry reported to me that they were all cleaning up the table and doing dishes in the kitchen and Meagan, who had only few bites of mashed potatoes, most likely with a very sick stomach from the letter, walked into the den to get away for a moment of peace.  Not realizing her father was behind her in the den, she turned and Lucius went up to her and started to press his body against hers. He then started to feel her breasts. ” You are developing quite well I see “.  Uncle Larry walked into the room and saw Lucius with his hands on Meagan’s chest and knocked Lucius to the ground with one punch. They scuffled on the floor and all the while, Lucius was grinning, even laughing.  The police were called,  came and left with Lucius in handcuffs. After that, Meagan quietly removed herself from the room, and went to her closet…the one place she felt safe. But she knew she would never be safe again.

The outcome of Lucius’s arrest you might ask ? Of course, Lucius claimed to simply be angry that Meagan was not talking to him at Thanksgiving Dinner and that she was still living with Larry and Ann because he and his daughter were having some issues. Lucius further claimed that he had set up therapy for Meagan [ with Red }, but Meagan had refused to attend further sessions. In that anger, he said he put his hands on Meagan’s shoulders but stopped short of shaking her to admonish her for her behavior. Lucius agreed to the fact that he was angry and needed to learn to control that anger. Lucius appeared before a Judge that he “knew well” , and Lucius’s attorney questioned the only witness,  Larry. Larry testified that he wasn’t  sure what he really saw, so the Judge ordered Lucius to go to Anger Management Classes. Evil wins again !

Of course, just prior to appearing before the Judge, Lucius made it clear to Larry that he would make charges against him for assault unless he changed his story. Lucius knew that Meagan was too terrified to speak in her defense. So Larry, at the peak of his fear and weakness, and conjuring up all his failures in life, gave into that fear, further abandoning Meagan.

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Loved to Death : Chapter 15 Wanting it All to End !

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

Later, after everyone left and Uncle and Aunt were downstairs cleaning up…she knew what she needed to do. She knew where Uncle Larry kept his gun, and then, so it would not make a mess, she sat in their oversized clawfoot bathtub and shot herself  in the chest with his .38 Special Revolver.

Uncle Larry e-mailed coach. ” We are losing M. She shot herself in my bathtub with my gun, with MY GUN ! She has  lost so much blood. She is in surgery. Talk to you later, if I can. I could not protect her !”   

I expected Meagan to die, as she was fragile even before this horrible drama. How could I expect this young lady to endure all she has and be manipulated for so long by her father, her daddy. I felt in my heart that she wanted it all to end, and I couldn’t blame her. I thought it was over and another very sick monster of a human being had won. I was so angry and nauseated, my heart was beating so fast that I felt I would pass out !

In the morning I awoke from a very restless night to a barrage of e-mails from Larry. He would not call me as he would have felt such shame and expected harsh words from me for trusting Lucius after all my warnings.  His e-mails filled me in about all the happenings and details of what occurred on Thanksgiving.  “ I just took my eyes off of her for two minutes, and I thought Lucius was berating Becky at the bar. Our little girl was so petrified when Lucius cornered her. I will never forget the look on her face, the look of terror, or maybe surrender. ” 

Then about five hours later, another message, “ She is just out of surgery and they say she has a forty percent chance of survival, but she  might make it.”

It seems a miracle, but Meagan made it through surgery. They were not sure if they got all the splintered bone chips from ribs and sternum, there some lung damage but she missed her heart. They were worried about clots, but she was alive for now. The doctors said she needs to stay there until well enough to transfer. She made it, but what was to follow ? Where would she be safe ?  What could I do to help her now ?  Who could I trust as caregivers? 

Her recuperation was slow….and her health and immune system were vulnerable and continued at risk. She would be in a private room and then transferred to an after-care facility for extended care at least a month, maybe more, then go back to Larry and Ann’s for bedrest and visiting nurses coming into their home.

Larry eventually told me about what happened in court and that he was burned out and scared for Meagan, Ann and himself. I did not  show my anger or  frustration as it would have done little good. I knew he would never be a part of Meagan’s Support Team, if Meagan actually lived to need one, but my anger was hard for me to contain. He was so weak and pathetic, but then I tried to recall how fears can be so paralyzing. He would have to live with his pain, and I imagined that it would unbearable. There were opportunities where I had suggested therapy, not with me of course, but he refused.

“Larry, how is our young lady doing.?”

“ Coach, this is all my fault. Ann and I are just overwhelmed by Lucius and how evil he can be ! But he seems  to be regretful as to what has happened. He said he would have never expected this from Meagan. I mentioned his note to her and how that was the last straw for Meagan, that is what put her over the edge. How could a father think this way and express those feelings, to the daughter he said he loved ?”

Lucius denied sending any note to Meagan and wanted to see his daughter. ” I do not know where you got that idea. What note ? It was probably her Coach ! He just wants to create chaos between me and my daughter. She has these delusions of what I have done to her  and her Coach just reinforces these lies. I would like to see my daughter and have some time with her, but I know you will want to be with me. So what time can you meet me in the lobby of the hospital ?”

“ Coach, we set a time for  tomorrow afternoon to meet at the hospital.” 

“ Larry, he does not care. He just wants to be assured that she will never testify against him if it would come to that. I would recommend that you go early. I do not want Lucius to be alone with Meagan.”

“ Coach, Meagan is in an  induced coma with  feeding tube, don’t you think you are going too far ?” I could sense that he felt regret for saying this after all the times he failed to be able to protect Meagan.

“ Larry, I would rather go too far to protect Meagan. All of you have been so gullible and not wanting to admit how sick your brother truly is ! I have been wrestling in my mind trying to get past my anger and frustration, and how very, very difficult it is for you to grasp all this. You have been a victim at the hands of Lucius. You need to realize how powerful evil is, and that Lucius, your brother, is the devil. He is evil with no boundaries ! He may be a psychopath !

“ Ok Coach, but I think you are overdosed on Lucius !”

“ Larry, he has no conscience ! Just do not let him be alone with Meagan for any reason !”

That night I had another very restless time sleeping. I woke up in the morning after a crazy dream where I was surrounded by cardboard boxes, dozens of them with bright red “Fragile” stickers plastered all over them. The guys transporting these boxes were tossing them around like they were pillows, and the boxes were bouncing and hitting all sides of the delivery truck, totally oblivious or not caring about the fragile nature of the contents. It did not take Freud to explain this dream, as I knew it was about Meagan. The thought kept running through my mind, even in this critical fragile condition, and even in a private hospital room, Meagan was not safe from Lucius. !

Lucius had already taken steps to trash the therapy with the Psychologist, whom Meagan called “Red” through some kind of blackmail, and the successful sessions with Mary had been sabotaged by Lucius through manipulating her boss in ways I did not know yet.  So how far would he go to silence Larry, Ann and especially Meagan, and then me, to protect his private sick world ? I was seeing Lucius in a different light  as of late. He has emotional and sexual insecurities since childhood, maybe seeing himself as bi-sexual or gay so he has to prove his masculinity every minute of every day. He doesn’t want to feel emotionally needy or dependent. So the obsession with being in control might be what controls him. The obsession with power is most likely stoked by his fear of not having power. He was, in fact, an insecure man who protected himself by attacking and using others, even his own wife and daughter.

Larry finally called me and I could hear the strain in his voice. “ Coach, I went to meet Lucius at the hospital after already calling the nurses station and asking them to hold Lucius back from seeing Meagan until I got there. I could not give them the details, so as her father, he would have every right to see her. But I want you to know even though I got there a half hour early, I found Lucius in her room alone with Meagan, and he had been there an hour. I don’ t understand how any man could be like this, but even though she was in a coma, he was talking to her firmly and had his hands under her sheets.  He quickly removed his hands, smiled and left. Coach, I  promise I will be there , or Ann, every day, night and day from now until she comes home to us. Please don’t  say anymore. I know I have failed again.”

Needless to say. I had no contact with Meagan for almost four months. The consensus was that she would survive, but be weak and her body would be very vulnerable to infections, but I was more concerned about her psyche, her emotional well-being. How could she endure all this ugly reality that she numbed herself to for so many years ? I realized at this point that she would most likely give up the fight to cause  her father to face consequences for all he had done to her, all the lies, all the blame, shame and guilt he used to keep her under his control. I  had little hope.

If by chance we could amass a defined and stronger Support System, could Meagan gain enough strength to turn against and expose Lucius for what he really was, and is, the personification of evil ? Am I kidding  myself ? Was there any saving of this child ?

Would Lucius continue his efforts to emotionally abuse and shut Meagan down so that anything she said would not be believable ? Could he eliminate all his witnesses by fostering fear in them ?

I was hell bent on continuing to create a case to destroy Lucius, but it made me sick inside to feel this way.

I told myself that when the subconscious mind is more active and the controlling, and the conscious, scheming part of his personality is not ruling his thoughts as effectively, I would hope and pray that there are moments when he mourns the losses of love and trust, and true connection with others, like Meagan. Most likely in the night-time hours, especially if he had been drinking at his Men’s Club, he might be more vulnerable.

Another month passed. I tried to keep in contact with Larry, but he was different, most likely not wanting to deal with Lucius … or Meagan anymore. It was just too much.  I knew Meagan was not up to talking much and was doing some self -care, fixing her own breakfast etc. according to notes I was getting from Ann.

Finally after three more months, a call from Larry. “ Coach, Larry here. Meagan is up and about for a few hours a day, but is still weak, very weak. I do not know whether she wants to talk to you, she has said nothing.  I am sorry again for my weakness in my dealing with my brother. Ann and I are worn out. I think Ann is as frustrated with me as you are.”

“ Larry, I know that Lucius is not done with Meagan. I know that my only chance to help Meagan is to neutralize Lucius by having a Support Group, and a body of  evidence from those he has manipulated,  threatened and controlled. My efforts so far in building that Support Group are not bearing much fruit. It seems, as expected, everyone is paralyzed by fear of further retaliation and threats from the man with no conscience. But this is the only chance to really help Meagan !  You do see this, don’t you Larry? “  Dead silence !

So I went on, “But I am sure Lucius has a breaking point and that can be breached if we come at him as a group, and if we have an attorney to guide us. Do you know of anyone ? I think the other attorneys in your area must despise him as I would bet they have faced his brutal attacks on their clients. He probably wins cases because he digs deep to find dirt on the opposing attorneys and their clients, and then uses that information to get what he wants.”

“ Coach, I don’t think I can be of any help to you. Although Ann’s sister has not seen us or any of the family here for years because she knew Lucius was bad news and witnessed some of his abusive tactics with his wife, her husband is an attorney. In fact her husband Adam was the one who demanded they move away ! I was going to call him to make changes to our Trusts  and Wills. I will look up his info and shoot it over to you. But don”t count on me to be part of this ! Coach,  I am not strong enough. I have to tell you some things that Meagan won’t, but I cannot do it yet, it is just too unbearable to think that…..well, if you only knew how I have failed Meagan and Ann, and myself !”

“ Please Larry, help me help Meagan !”

“ Sorry Coach, I have failed even more than you know.  Goodnight !

I did receive the contact info for Adam, the attorney and brother-in-law to Ann, from Larry.

Then, later that afternoon I received a short note from Meagan, sounding like she was saying goodbye.  ” Thank you Coach for all you have tried to do for me !”

 “ Meagan, you have been through so much. I don’t think the atmosphere at your Uncle and Aunt’s has been what I hoped for, but remember, I mentioned another option that you have. Come  to Ohio, stay with us and go to school here …you would be safe here ! We will arrange safe transportation for you.

I have just heard from Mary. She tried to call you but did not get an answer or know where you were. If she would have called me sooner I would have helped her make contact with you. She is safe and she wants to work more with you by phone or with other forms of tele-conferencing. She is considering moving to Ohio and joining our counseling practice. She wants to be part of your Support Team, along with her Uncle Georgio who is a retired Policeman, actually a Detective, and he wants to be on our Team too. 

I am telling you this because you need to understand that we have a Support Team now of strong people and we are adding more. Men like your father can only win when they go up against someone who has no support and power. It is ok and smart to be afraid of Lucius as he has proven to not have a conscience, but for the first time he will be up against a group of people as strong as him, maybe stronger, because they support one another, and support you and the truth.

You are not saying anything, but I know you are listening. I know you have such doubt that your father can be dealt with and stopped. Your Uncle Larry and Aunt Ann are not strong enough because they are family, and they are paralyzed by their fears and guilt at not being able to help you, protect you. I have a few other people I want to add to your Support Team that will give it even more strength, but in the meantime, I do not want you to give up. We are already collecting evidence and proof of your father’s, excuse me, Lucius’ behavior and ugly deeds, not only towards you, but other victims. We will stop him !   You do not have to testify against him if you can’t. The evidence we are starting to collect is enough to take his power way. ”

“ Coach, I don’t want you to get hurt, but thank you for trying !

“ Meagan, please think about it. It can and will work !”

{ Poof, she was gone ! }

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Loved to Death: Chapter 16 Meagan’s Note

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

Meagan was not responding to my further contacts all that week  I did not really expect to hear much as she was still heavily drugged and suppose to be in bed healing and I think receiving home-based physical therapy.

Larry was not responding to my contacts either, but that did not surprise me. I know he is riddled with guilt at his failures to protect Meagan.

After a few more  days I received an envelope filled with letters and notes written by Meagan. My heart sank as I read each blood curdling word. I was nauseated by her words. I am not sure who sent them, Meagan  or Ann.

The one that struck me so deeply was about Lucius coming to Larry’s house during the day when no one else was there to protect Meagan.

This is Meagan’s note, handwritten and dripping with agony and pain if you choose to read it ! It is disgusting, and I thought I had heard it all !

“ Dear Coach,

Oh how can I even write this, I am so bad and wicked. I know better. Sinful. Sinful. Sinful.

Went to the door cause UPS was dropping off stuff for Aunt Ann. They always ring the bell and leave.  But it was my dad. He stuck his foot in the door. He jumped in and the door hit me in the head. He grabbed my arm and when I did try to fight him he pulled my hair all the way to the bedroom. I can’t write it , it is so bad.

Writing it makes it so real, but it is real, it is happening.

My bottom hurts and I am still bleeding. He said he would kill Uncle Larry and Aunt Ann. He did not say Coach, but I fear he might !

He put me on the bed and put his belt in my face. I can’t explain it and I can’t write it. I am trying. 


He can be so mean. I hate him. I do hate him. I promise I do. I promise I was not bad and I didn’t misbehave.

Why ? I don’t understand.

Why do this to me ?

I have to write it. I have to get the evil out of me. It sometimes makes it better. My anger and hate for him fills my heart, it feels like my heart will stop and I will die. I want to die.

He turned me over and took my panties off. He grabbed my hips and was between my legs. He said I had to be good and I was a slut and needed to know what sluts did. He put something in my behind and slapped my behind to make it red and then he told me to F his dick and I said please no and he said “tell me, tell me what you really want me to do” and grabbed my hair and hit my bottom so hard ….I tried to say please daddy- please daddy – I was crying and didn’t want to but he said it over and over again. He rubbed me with something  I could not see and he put something in my butt and it hurt so badly. I screamed and he just kept doing it. M ”

I was sickened by what I read ! I was pacing the hallways of my office as I could not believe what I was reading. My tears ran down onto the pages, page after page. It has only been a four months since her life and death surgery, and this sociopathic, sexually addicted father is doing this to his own daughter !

The other written notes were similar but were indicating that Lucius would come at night to Larry and Ann’s home, enter the house at will with a key he had from the past, and have his way with Meagan. In the beginning she yelled and cried loudly, but then she stopped screaming for help because Uncle Larry and Aunt Ann ignored it, they did not save her or protect her, they were ruled by fear. God help this poor child.  God help Larry and Ann for they will forever live with the guilt of allowing this to happen.

I keep writing her asking her to come here to Ohio and to work with our Support Team,  but she is not responding !


Please come to Ohio. You need to be safe and we can provide that for you. I know that you are so terribly hurt, both physically and emotionally. I am deeply sorry that you had to endure all this and that your Uncle and Aunt  could not protect you even in their own home. But please consider coming here, we will keep you safe and you can make choices of what school you want to go to here and what programs you are interested in now that you know you have the freedom to choose. We CAN and WILL protect you. Lucius will not bother you ever again if you are here, we are going to make sure of that !!!

PLEASE answer ! “

“ Coach, I am sorry. No one can protect me from him. And I do not want him to harm you or Uncle Larry and Aunt Ann.

Please do me a favor, actually two favors. Pray that God is not mad at me and will accept me, and also, please watch for a girl named  Renee. I have been talking to her in the Chat Room. She is only ten years old, and she is homeless. She is much stronger and has more courage than me, and she wants a family. I told her you would help her. Please do this for me. Love you Coach for all you have tried to do for me, but I  cannot  do this anymore. I don’t even have the energy left to breathe.

Goodbye Coach, and please don’t forget me ! ”  

At this point I was panicking that Meagan was going to hurt  herself. So I called Ann from my cell phone to quickly check on Meagan. It felt like forever, but Ann did answer the phone and told me Meagan had left the previous day right after Ann went shopping and Larry went to work. Larry was looking for her. She told me they had two rental apartments on the other side of town and one was vacant, and she thought that  Meagan had taken the key. I hung up abruptly and tried again to get a response from Meagan.

“ Meagan, Please tell me where you are. I will come and get you and bring you to a safe place, get you medical attention and we will make this right. God is not angry at you, but wants you to be safe. Please answer me. “

“ Coach, please don’t worry about me anymore. I am so tired…..”

I suspected she had overdosed so I tried to call Ann again. I was trying to stay calm but I knew what was happening.

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Loved to Death : Chapter 17 We Failed Her

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

” Coach, will you please hear my confession. We failed Meagan and I do not know if I can live with it.” 

“ Ann, I am very concerned that she will or has taken her own life !

I am guessing from the notes and letters I have received from Meagan, or maybe you, that  her father was continuing to sexually abuse his daughter while under your roof .”

“ Coach, Larry is a good person, but never could give up the need for praise from his father and Lucius. He idolized that devil Lucius, because he felt so insecure. I wanted to say something when you first called us about Meagan coming to stay with us, but he gave me the sign that I was  not to interfere.”

“ I sure wish you had said something, but at the same time, what were the choices Ann ?”

“Larry left the house today saying he hates himself for allowing Meagan to be abused in our own home. Yes, I found her notes and sent them to you, horrible, unbelievable and made me sick to my stomach ! I will never forgive myself, but Larry physically held me back when Meagan was being attacked by her father. I know that is a poor excuse, but I was so afraid of Lucius and Larry’s fear on top of that. He was afraid that  Lucius would kill both of us if we interfered. We would both rather be dead than live with this guilt, believe me.

Larry just called on the other line. He will be angry I am talking to you. Hold on a second.

Coach, Meagan is dead from an overdose ! He called the police, met with them, and I have to go there to make a report.  I wish I was dead, and so does he. We will live with this guilt for the rest of our days….and nights ! 

I think Larry is about to do something stupid, like go after Lucius.

I am so sorry we failed you and poor Meagan. She loved you. You reminded her of her maternal grandfather and she trusted you. So sorry, I don’t know what to say.”

“ Ann, I cannot talk to you about this right now. Go to meet with the police. I am too angry and sad to talk.”

Well, this would be  the end of the story, and another bad guy got away ! I was so angry and frustrated to hear of Meagan’s death, but of course, not surprised. It did not have to be this way. I felt I had failed to find the right words, but then turned my anger and frustration where it belonged, Lucius. Meagan’s father drove her to take her life, twice, and finally she was at peace. About an hour had passed and I knew I could not leave the situation with Ann, and yes Larry, like I did. They were in pain too ! It was their fear that blinded them to not see evil when it was right in front of them. But I knew it was not really over, again thinking, they are the only real witnesses to this tragedy.

The next day I called Ann. After discussing the stress  and anguish when talking to the police, Ann sounded totally defeated and frustrated with herself.

“ I have to be honest, I am angry that you and Larry could not protect her, but in reality, I understand how fear ruled over you both. Tell him I am working on a plan to take power away from Lucius. It could not save Meagan,  she was poisoned by her dependency on Lucius for her whole life. I will do everything I can to  stop him from harming others. I have the beginnings of a team that is working to gather evidence to at least cut the fangs out of that snake. But I cannot talk to Larry right now.”

” I will tell him Coach. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive us for our weakness. I do not know how we can forgive ourselves.”

” Ann, I just had a thought that one day you will be an important part of the team that takes Lucius down. I don’t know where that thought came from but I just saw a picture in my mind and it included you. Maybe Meagan is whispering in my ear ! “

I learned years ago when I started working with clients who were being abused, especially by sociopathic-like perps, that most victims cannot go up against their abuser alone. They need the support of other team members who know all the facts and can emotionally support the victim or abused person. We have a conscience and that makes us like David going up against Goliath without his weapon of choice. So victims need to weaponize with evidence, an attorney and other support people.

I have Meagan’s counselor Mary and her Uncle Georgio who is a retired Police Officer and Detective that I am trying to get to join us, a Catholic Priest who has years of experience dealing with persons who have been controlled and manipulated  by sociopathic personalities,  a Psychiatrist who use to work for me, and myself.  I need  an Attorney down in your area, possibly a few other victims of Lucius’s manipulation and maybe you !  Then we start talking and building our case against Lucius. Hopefully, some of his enemies, especially attorneys that have been victims of his digging up dirt on them  to get what he wants from them. I share all my info and evidence with each member of the team for our own protection and I make Lucius aware of it all, not the names, but their positions. I want him to sweat.”

” Coach, I can volunteer my brother-in-Law Adam, he is an attorney. He knows of Lucius and it is time I bring my family back to support me. I have lost Larry, he is an empty shell.  I will have him call you, is that alright.”

“Yes Ann, Larry mentioned Adam to me in our last talk and sent me contact info. Please talk to Adam and see if he would be  available and then, if so, give him my contact info.”

“Coach, not sure about me being a part of the team. I sure don’t have a good track record. And how about Larry.”

” Ann, give it some thought and I think NO regarding Larry, he is just too conflicted  over Lucius. Larry may be a reluctant witness if we go that far.

“Ann, one more thing, would it freak you out to go to Meagan’s bedroom and take all the sheets and pillow cases and her pajamas and carefully put them in a clean plastic storage bag ? ”

“ I know what you are asking for and why Coach. And it does freak me out,  but maybe I can forgive myself an ounce or two if I can do anything for Meagan that I could not do when she was crying for us. I am so filled with shame !”

“ Ann, I am calling a Lab that I use to test specimens for clients. Can I schedule a  time when they can pick up Meagan’s bed clothes and sheets ?”

“ Yes Coach. I will be here. Have them call me so I will for sure be around in case the Police need to talk us again.

Coach, may I ask you for something.  Could you at least talk with Larry, not as a therapist, but as his Coach because he is going to need therapy and he is so despondent, depressed and sick with himself ? Please !”

“ I will consider it Ann. If he contacts me, I will interact with him and try to get him to a therapist. ”

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Loved to Death: Chapter 18 Adam, Our Chance

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

“ Hello, Dr. Benedetto, or Coach, whatever you wish to be called. I am calling you at the insistence of my sister-in-law Ann.”

“ I would prefer Coach. May I call you Adam ?”

“ Yes, for the time being. Ann has told me your plans for going after Lucius and that you have formed a Team, and are asking me to be part of that Team. This is not how I work. Although I have no fond feelings for Lucius, and pressured my wife to move to another County to make space from that part of her family, I had decided when Ann asked me to be involved that I would answer in the negative. 

However, I just returned from Meagan’s funeral, and it was very dark and left me very suspicious and I cannot let go of the feeling that this was the result of something decadent and perverse carried out by Lucius. So, send me what evidence you have and I will look it over. I am not yet saying I will be part of your Team, but I will think hard about it.”

“ Adam, I wish I could have made it to the funeral out of respect for Meagan. Why do you say you’re suspicious ?”

“ Well, there was Lucius, a stone cold look on his face, no emotion, staring at his brother and sister-in-law as if he was sending them a coded message. There was no consoling by Lucius of his wife Becky, who was dressed in dark blue pant suite with a long sleeve jacket on one of our hottest days on record.  She had a wide brimmed hat on with a dark veil so you could not see her face, but there were tears dripping down on her jacket during the entire service. You would think that Lucius would take her hand and try to console her, but it was like she was not there. 

His brother Larry was sobbing and trembling throughout the funeral and Ann was too. Larry kept looking at Lucius to see if he was still staring at him, and he was, which obviously made Larry nervous. It was such an intense, cold stare…almost demonic and threatening. ”

“ Adam, maybe Becky was dressed that way to hide bruises on her arms, legs and face !”

“ Food for thought Coach, but it was strange. I will call you after I look over the items you send me.”

“Thank you Adam.”

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Loved to Death : Chapter 19: The Team, Maybe

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

” Mary, Meagan took her own life !  We both knew that was a strong possibility. I am miserable and very upset that I could not do anymore. In a final note to me, Meagan thanked me for trying to help and asked me to tell you she really appreciated your taking time with her, but was fearful that her daddy, Lucius, would get to her even if she took me up on my offer to have her come up to Ohio with us. She could continue therapy with you, while going to one of the many Universities we have so she could see choices for her life and career. I thought she was close to agreeing to that offer for a while, but in my heart I knew she would not take me up on it.  This  does not mean it is all over. For me, I have just realized,  it has really just begun ! I am going after Lucius and I need your help.”

“ My God Coach, there are no limits to this man’s evilness. I am so sorry we lost her. You must be devastated ! “

“ Mary, I am angry, and yes,  I would have to say devastated…but mostly depressed that I could not help her more. I am re-focusing all my energy making Lucius pay for what he has done. I cannot  let this go if I want to sleep at night. 

I am still trying to gather a Support Team for Meagan, as I hinted at with you before, consisting of first, professionals who know what it is like to deal with controlling, manipulative or sociopathic persons. Next, other victims of Lucius and then victims of other sociopathic abusers that I have dealt with in my practice,  who have successfully fought back. I am asking again if you will be part of this Support Team. I would like to add your Uncle Georgio with his special background and skills if you would ask him. The team will include at least one attorney to do anything legal we need to do, and I have a strong candidate for that person. The  plan is to have the attorney we use share any pertinent info on Lucius’s activities and abuse with other members of the Team so that Lucius cannot isolate anyone again, as that is part of where he gets his power. We will collect affidavits and evidence and  stop him. Former victims of Lucius’s abuse will take time to find and convince but I already have a line on some. Lucius has made enemies of many of the other attorneys in town, and I suspect a judge or two.   I have past clients who are part of my on-line support group. We have have successfully immobilized each of their abusers using this same team approach as I am suggesting to you. At some point in the near future, we will all meet, if only on the phone or video. If I can secure the involvement of the Attorney, he will take the lead and guide us. Each member of the team needs to know they will be protected because if any member is threatened, we will notify the others and release pertinent information. “

“ Whoa Coach, that sounds serious to me, and risky going up against a sociopath. But count me in ! What he has done to Meagan is horrible. Again, I am very appreciative of your offer to join your practice and I may take you up on that. My mother developed some dementia and I have been staying home with her and working with a few clients. And no, my boss never called the Counseling Board. That was a good call on your part. When I threatened an investigation as you recommended he freaked out. He didn’t have the balls to do anything but fire me, so that only convinced me that the weasel was doing Meagan’s father’s work.  And listen to this, as much as my parents are avoiders and just want me to move on, my Uncle Georgio is still so incensed as to what happened to me that he already has done some investigating on his own. So I am sure he would be willing to be part of this Support Team.”

“ Did he find out any connection between Lucius and your boss, whatever his name is ? Can I talk to your Uncle ?”

“ My Uncle will contact you after he  digs a little deeper, but I am sure he is a go with the Support Team idea. Yes, this is great stuff. My former boss, Mr. Julius, is bi-sexual, well gay I think.  As you thought, he belongs to the same private Men Only Club that Lucius does, and Lucius is sort of the godfather of this group of horny men. My Uncle is Italian, and likes his wine. So he played like he was drunk outside this Club and got friendly with a few guys as they were leaving. I wish I could have watched my Uncle in action. Surprising what you can get out of guys who are all liquored up, not that I would know ! He acted as if he wanted to join and they said he would have to talk to Lucius inside about that. My Uncle did not go in, but he checked some court records and found that Lucius was the attorney that represented my boss Mr. Julius in his divorce from his wife who was listed as a Psychologist, a Dr. Olivia. What are the chances this was Meagan’s Red haired psychologist ? He is checking that out now. Wouldn’t that be an interesting connection ?”

“ She is his wife ? Meagan called her “ Red” but told me her name was Dr. Olivia. Oh my God ! This may be a real break for our side, a connection !”

“Coach, I am so nervous and very excited about this, both defending my name and reputation, and going after Lucius ! Good grief, I just realized how much having Uncle Georgio on my side, My Team , and knowing you were offering me a counseling opportunity, gave me strength to think about going after my old boss. So, yes, I definitely want to be on Meagan’s Team “

“ That’s it Mary, a Support Team gives each member strength to do and say what needs to be done ! Sociopaths want to divide and conquer, isolate and blame, shame and guilt ! And what your Uncle has uncovered already gives us so much to work with, this is great. Let me know what your uncle comes up with. I think the Attorney I had in mind, who is married to Aunt Ann’s sister is a real possibility for the Team but I will confirm that soon. Talk to you soon ! ”

Two weeks later we had a report from the lab that Meagan’s sheets and night clothes were indeed smothered with male sperm ! DNA anyone ?

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Loved to Death : Chapter 20 The Bribes

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

What a surprise I received in the mail !  A check made out to me personally from Lucius for $ 100,000.00  with the attached note.

“ As a broken hearted father who misses the pride of his life, I am gifting you this money in appreciation for all your efforts on behalf of my dear daughter Meagan.

Please use this money to help other confused, misguided and delusional teenagers. There must be many out there who need your services.  L.B.”

Lucius  is showing his hand !  He is claiming his daughter Meagan was confused, misguided and delsuional ! That would be his defense ?  

My next thought was how dare he try to bribe me.  But then again, this is what the sociopath does to throw you off and try to manipulate his victims.  I would never except this bribe, this money is drenched in Meagan’s blood and is the money that I suspect was in her Trust from her maternal Grandfather. I was both angry and tearful at the mere thought of what he put Meagan through all those years. My final thought was that we have him sweating, and worrying about what we might do in Meagan’s name. He was, I hoped in turmoil and obsessing at how he left a trail, as he had felt untouchable and invincible.

I tore up the check and sent it back  after making copies and sending them to members of my own ‘personal’ support team that I use for protection when I am dealing with such a critical and sensitive issue. They have copies of all my notes and Meagan’s letters.

Within a week I received a second check asking for me to please reconsider, that my work was so important and that Meagan would want me have this. The check was for $150,000.  I tore up this check and sent it back with the note, “ I do not want any of your blood money. You will have to live with what you have done until your last breath, and hopefully beyond ! ” 

Within days I received a short note from Lucius. “ You fool, you do not know who you are dealing with ! ” 

“ My e-mail response was, “ Oh yes I do, you are the father who  loved his daughter to death  !  You are a sociopath ! And now you will be without her for eternity ! ”

It felt very good that he was having some kind of mental spasms as he felt some loss of control. I have to admit I hoped something dreadful would happen to him ! I was shaking in my socks as to what was to come next, but there was no way to stop this need to cause him to face responsibility for what he had done. My biggest concern was how he was going to protect himself from the potential eye-witnesses, being Larry and Ann. They were the only eye-witnesses after Meagan was eliminated. I would never think that Larry would testify against his brother, but Ann, a definite maybe.  I knew that Lucius would cook-up some diabolical plan to silence them.

It almost sounds evil, but I was sending Lucius each of the more than thirty notes, all  hand-written, that Meagan wrote after each of her father’s  brutal sexual attacks while she was supposedly under the care of Larry and Ann. Of course, I was not aware of these notes, or the continual rapes,  until they were sent to me after Meagan’ s death, but I felt I should have expected something like this from a man with no conscience and a thirst for power and control that was unquenchable.  One at a time, I spaced the notes, her pleading with her father to stop, a few days apart. Sounds mean, but he deserved to face his sickening crimes, the reality of how he was destroyed his daughter. Each time.  I would send one just before I left the my office for the evening.  The next morning I would get an ugly, almost unreadable and rambling note that he would create in the middle of the night, usually around two or three A.M. 

Of course, I reminded him that I had shared all my notes and Meagan’s cries for help with my own “personal” Support Group of professionals. That was the only protection I had !

Lucius  was making mistakes, errors  in judgement. Sending me bribes, all the threats, all using his e-mail address. This is where I became more assured he was a sociopath, not a psychopath.  A psychopath would not make such errors in judgement. He will hang himself with all his brazen errors in judgement.

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Loved to Death : Chapter 21 Making the Connections

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

“ Coach, it’s Mary. I need to catch you up with some interesting information my Uncle, our Detective, has been gathering. 

So we know Lucius was the attorney that represented my boss, Mr. Julius, in his divorce from his wife, Dr. Olivia. We know now that Dr. Olivia was Meagan’s first therapist.

My Uncle met with Mr. Julius , acting as if he was looking for a Counseling position !  Then he handed Mr. Julius a folder that my old boss thought was his resume. Well, it was, sort of ! It was a copy of my Uncle’s credentials which at first was very confusing for Mr. Julius. Then when Uncle Georgio pulled out his badge, and said, let’s talk about your divorce and your Attorney, Lucius B. 

I guess Mr. Julius freaked out ! Damn, this is my Uncle’s second performance and I missed both of them.”

“ Mary, I wish I could have seen your Uncle in action too. What he is doing could make all the difference in our efforts to stop Lucius. ”

“I know Coach ! This is my  Uncle’s account of their meeting and what was said. And yes he had a recorder going which Mr. Julius was aware of, because he wanted us to hear word for word what he admitted to.  But it went way better than even he expected. Mr. Julius turned white as a brides dress and could not stop talking, he was so scared.

My ex-boss then asked if he could call his lawyer, Lucius B.

My Uncle coldly told Mr. Julius,  “ Go ahead, it will save me a trip. I would like to arrest him as soon as he sets one foot in the door. My Uncle was bluffing, but then again, he knew  from Mary that we had DNA evidence now.”

“Mr. Julius was so intimidated by Uncle Georgio’s demeanor and badge that he did not even notice it was from a different state so that my Uncle had no authority to do anything but intimidate intimidators. And it sure worked this time.

Mr. Julius spilled what was a treasure-trove of information. Here is my Uncle Georgio’s notes from the recording.

Mr. Julius mentioned that he met Lucius at the Men Only  Club, that Lucius handled his divorce from Dr. Olivia, his now ex-wife. That he left her for  a gay man, a grad student at the same University that employed him as an administrator for of the Counseling Department, so Lucius said that we needed to settle this as quickly as possible.   Lucius  strongly suggested that if the University found out the details, that he would most likely be fired. That he could pull some strings and call in some favors, plus mentioned that Mr. Julius could do  a  favor for him. ”

Lucius said to Mr. Julius, “I would like you to arrange for one of your counselors to be fired, and I want a certain client’s records to disappear.”

Mr. Julius was visibly shaken as he divulged this info to Uncle Georgio. “Listen, this Attorney is a real bad dude and he scares me to death. Can I get some protection ?”

“So, Mr. Julius, you did what he asked, you fired a counselor for deleting records on a client of hers.”

“ Yes, the client was his daughter, so I deleted her file and let the therapist go !  I feel terrible about it, but this man, this attorney is psychologically ill, I would guess, psychopathic. The therapist is young and is really good so she probably got another job in a week. I was afraid for my life and my career, and I have only three years to go until my retirement. And with the divorce and all, finances are going to be tough.”

“ Will you sign a letter swearing that what you have told me is true. I do not want you arrested or anything. You don’t need a police record.”

“Yes, but can you protect me from this Lucius character? “

“ If you type-up and sign a letter as to what we have discussed, you will become a part of a group of people, a Team that has like-wise been threatened, abused or blackmailed by Lucius B.  The power is with this Team, and the Psychologist who is organizing it. You will be a big part of that team and be able to redeem yourself.“

“ What if the girl I fired sues me. Again, I feel horrible about this.”

“ Well, Mr. Julius, you made the mistake of firing my niece, she was that counselor. I think she can be convinced that you were a victim as well as her. In that case I will recommend she not take any action against you.”

“ Oh, then you are not a policeman.”

“ Oh yes,  lieutenant and a detective. You just happened to fire my niece for no good reason, and I take issue with that, serious issue ! You may  have redeemed yourself, as I am looking for bigger game ! Did you know that your attorney hired your ex-wife to counsel his daughter ?”

“ No, I had no idea she was seeing my attorney’s daughter ! I am surprised at that, seems a little weird to me. Why my ex-wife ? There are so many therapists in this town.”

“ I was thinking the same thing. But as he was your attorney, and might he be aware of something in your ex-wife’s history that would cause him to pick her to see his daughter ? He had to have something on her for him to have control , to blackmail her. ”

“ I can’t think of anything….but wait. We met, Lucius, me, my wife and her attorney a couple times before the divorce was final. My wife did admit to having a couple of affairs during our marriage but it made no difference to me. I just wanted out. And the marriage failed mostly because of me, you know, my being bi-sexual.”

“ Mr. Julius, do you think your wife ever had an affair with one of her clients ?”

“ I was always suspicious that she had an affair with one of her more wealthy clients, he was an exec for the oil company. You know, one of those guys pulling in a fortune. But again, I did not care ! She would talk about him often, his making big bucks and being a part of the social scene that I could not provide. She  needed to marry someone who could help support her lifestyle, and needs, and I was not that guy. She joked about him being a six-footer making a six-figure income.

“ Oh, one more thing I guess I should tell you but I guess it doesn’t make a difference now.”

“What is that !” asked Georgio.

“ I have heard from two friends that they saw my ex out with Lucius right after our divorce. But, she can date anyone she wants now.”

{Loose Lips Sinks Ships}

Mr. Julius typed up and signed the letter and Uncle Georgio witnessed it, and signed also !

“ Thank you Mr. Julius, you have made my day ! ”

“ So Coach, what do you think ?”

“ Mary, this is terrific. You must feel relieved and redeemed. I am excited and tell your Uncle if he ever sees his way to Cleveland, I will take you and him to Little Italy. There are some great Italian restaurants and I have  a client who will make sure he is treated well !

He really has done a great job. I don’t know if I would have the chops for that kind of work ! He is good ! I still want to talk to your Uncle.

I wish Meagan were still around to see everyone working on her Team for her.”

“ Coach, I believe she is watching ! ”

“ Mary, I so want to believe that ! ”

“ Uncle Georgio is planning to meet Dr. Olivia tomorrow !”

“ I hope this works as well as it did with Mr. Julius!”

Uncle Georgio had done his homework and knew that seeking the truth from Dr. Olivia was most likely going to take more effort than with her ex-husband, Mr. Julius.

He planned on taking advantage of her vanity and self-adoration to play this game out with her. He made an appointment, and within three days he was sitting in her waiting room. He knew by this time from his niece Mary, that Meagan had died of an overdose, and even not knowing her, it intensified his anger that much more.

He was developing a real hatred for Lucius, a father who could deceive and torture his own child so that she would see no value in living anymore.

So when Dr. Olivia’s receptionist brought him to her office door, he got right to the point.

“ You are going to listen to me and I will pay you for your time. That said, I want you to know your short term client, Meagan B…., is dead from an overdose. I know her father set up his daughter’s therapy with you. I know she saw you twice, and you called her father  when Meagan appeared inconsolable, and he seemed to be nearby as it only took a few minutes for him to show up at your door to collect what was left of his sobbing daughter. Meagan reported that you did not believe anything she said, told her that she was just hysterical and was dealing with the after-shock or post-traumatic stress from being raped on the University Campus. Meagan said that you seemed to know her father well and he would never do the things she was reporting.”

“ My Uncle said that Dr. Olivia, apparently feeling flustered and overwhelmed, tried to take control.”

“ Who are you ? I am going to call security.” 

“ Go for it, please, be my guest”, and he put his Lieutenant’s badge and Detectives License out where she could see them, barely, but if you feel it necessary to do that, I will go with your security person and then next I will start making phone calls to first, the Board of Psychology, to inform them that you had an affair with Meagan’s father.  I have witnesses. And secondly, you allowed Meagan’s  father  to seriously influence your counseling with his adult daughter. That will lead to an investigation, and probably a suspension of your license to practice until the issue is fully researched. Your office will close for that period of time. If what I say is found to be true, and it will be, you will lose your license, period.”

“ How dare you come in here and make these claims ! ”

“ Do you deny them so far, as I have other things on my list. And I have enough information on  another male client you are having the affair with that as a Detective, I can certainly get whatever I need. He is over six feet tall and makes six-figures and works for an oil company. There are only two oil companies in this area and only one who has execs that they pay six or seven figure salaries. This will  be a piece of cake for me and I would be just as happy to do the little foot work that it will take to find this man.

I expect that Lucius B.  knew about your affair with a client and used that information to blackmail you into seeing his daughter, and saying what you did to her, dismissing her claims and reducing her to a tear drenched lump of flesh and bones. What you said to her at her father’s insistence, put another nail in her coffin. I have witnesses who have seen you  out socially with Lucius B, so don’t even try to deny it. We will build a case that your negligence made you complicit in her suicide.

And there is more, but this is boring me. So I will leave and put the pieces together and tighten noose that  you have helped to create  unless you wish to come clean with me. I have one dead young lady to avenge. And the second counselor Meagan saw, who happens to be my niece, explored what she was saying and put the pieces  together, and God bless her, believed this young lady ! She was making progress until her father stepped up his own abuse of his only daughter. This is going to look bad and go bad for you ! We have a team of professionals working together on this case and we will persevere.”

Uncle Georgio expressed that by this  time, Dr. Olivia’s face was as red as her hair, and tears were welling-up, and she was trembling. He expected she was ready to talk, but for effect, Georgio got up and left with his badge and detective’s ID. “ I will call you within twenty-four hours and  ask if you wish to cooperate, because our real goal, the real enemy is Lucius B. ! And by the way, if you choose to call Attorney,  Lucius B., I am betting he will deny any involvement and leave you in  a sinking ship. But we will get him. Our Team will get Lucius.”

“Wait, Wait. His name is Philip, please don’t get him in any trouble. He is a great guy, but we broke it off and he stopped his divorce after finding out his wife had M.S.  I know I screwed up, and I thought I could handle it, but it has been eating at me, the whole thing with her father. He is a sociopath, and by the time I realized  that snake charmer was as sick as he was, I had already let him play me. He had me convinced that she was making it up as part of a Post Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms. I knew there was a possibility that she was telling the truth, but I was so terrified of him that I failed to consider that because he was so threatening. I prayed she would go to another therapist, but thought I had literally poisoned her. Lucius is so evil, and he would trash me in a second. He is heartless ! What can I do ? ”

Georgio responded , “  I don’t really want to expose you, I really don’t. But for my niece and Meagan, I will if I have to. If the Board finds out from Lucius, we will work on your behalf as to what you were dealing with ! “

“ I accept that. I do not want to deal with Lucius by myself !  “

“  I have more to share with you but it will hold. Now, I need a letter from you admitting to what you have told me, signed and I will witness. it. Then I will get back to you. I don’t want you to talk to anyone about this for now. ”

“ Believe me, I am not going to say a word !”

“ Dr. Olivia, in time I will introduce you to the other Team Members. ”

“ What do you think Coach ?”

“ Mary, that’s two more for the TEAM. You, your Uncle Georgio, Mr. Julius, Dr. Olivia, and me. Larry is very doubtful, but Ann is an eye-witness and seems to be almost ready to spill the beans. I have a Psychiatrist friend who has conferred with me on other cases and a Priest who is affiliated with child and adolescent abuse cases, who can be very helpful. Then, all I feel we really need is an Attorney, and I am going to make a second attempt to convince him to be a part of this.  He is familiar with Lucius B. and his brand of manipulation. Of course, on top of that is a number of attorneys Lucius has attempted to destroy. They hate him, from what I hear, but he has something on each one of them that keeps them from coming forward. He just digs for dirt, and thinks he can manipulate anyone with a conscience.

Thank you, and thank your Uncle for me.  I am going to contact Ann and see if she is on-board and then we can kick it up a notch. I would like to do a conference call with all the potential Team members and then present our game plan to the attorney I suspect, and pray, will join us.”

“ Coach, my Uncle Georgio just walked in and he wants to talk to you !”

“ Hey Coach, hope to meet you someday, but I wanted to let you know how happy I am that you helped my niece, Mary. I do not want to lose her, you know, if she decides to move to Ohio and work with you, but I figure she will do what’s best for her career. Of course,  I know of your loss of that child Meagan, and I want to do all I can to rid the world of the piece of shit father of hers.”

“Georgio, I can sure use the help. He is a very crafty S.O.B, but in your line of work I expect you have met your share of abusive and manipulative people. I want you to know how much I appreciate what you have already done regarding Dr. Olivia and Mr. Julius. That was some great ‘interviewing’ . I have a message that the attorney I would like to have join Meagan’s team tried to call, so I hope he will assist us.”

“Coach, I know you are a Psychologist and all, and hope you don’t  mind me calling you that, but I played my share of sports, and it is easier talking to you if I see you as Coach. And we are both Italians, go figure. What do you need from me ?”

“ Georgio, I am definitely OK you calling me Coach.  Tell Dr. Olivia and Mr. Julius I will be in touch. I want to seal the deal with the attorney, if I can, to be part of the Team. I have already sent him my notes to whet his appetite. Then we can all send whatever information or evidence to him. He is Meagan’s Aunt Ann’s brother-in-law, but moved with Ann’s sister to get her away from Meagan’s family because he felt Lucius was a very sick man. So he has not been in contact with Meagan or any of the family in years. Ann knew how evil Lucius was but could not bring herself to believe it. So she never contacted her sister or brother-in-law, because she didn’t know what to say. But she called him and talked to him about what has happened, and I think and pray he is on-board. And you know we have Meagan’s bed sheets  and night clothes from when she was staying with Ann and Larry, and when Lucius would come in at night and force sex on Meagan. Lab has test results and DNA. Makes me nauseous just saying that.”

“ Yes, Mary had told me about the DNA, sounds like you are gathering potential damning evidence too, and it will be interesting watching this bastard try to squirm his way out of this.”

“ I am going to try to call the Attorney Adam. So thanks again for all your work for Meagan and Mary.  Mary is blessed to have you as her Uncle. Most  people, even family want to avoid dealing with these kinds of issues.”

“ You bet Coach. Ciao !”

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Loved to Death : Chapter 22 The Team Becomes a Reality

by on Dec.16, 2020, under First Book : Loved to Death

“ Hello again, Adam

“ Hello Coach, my sister-in-law has told me more about you, and what you tried to do for Meagan. “

“ I checked you out with the Ohio Board of Psychology and you have a clean history. I have to admire your devotion to Meagan and your efforts. But, I will admit, I questioned your motives until I talked  more with my sister-in-law Ann. But, I am an Attorney, and it pays for me to be suspicious.”

“ Adam, were you suspicious about the relationship between Meagan and her father Lucius ?”

“ Yes, and being a logical thinker, I was uncomfortable with what I expected was going on when Meagan was a child and I saw her mother withdraw and Lucius take full control of her upbringing, which was when she was about twelve or thirteen, but I had no proof of anything. The extended family appeared to me to be in complete denial, keeping their distance, because Lucius was not a comfortable person to be around. He seemed controlling and manipulative and quick to anger if you crossed him in any way.”

“Yes, Adam, I have seen that. He was overly protective of Meagan and tried to keep me from talking to her many times, even threatening me ! ”

“ How did you handle that, may I ask ?” 

“ Meagan was an adult, at least by age, so I played a supportive role to gain trust so I could first see what the reason was that she was coming to our On-line group. If one of my on-line visitors needs help, my goal is to support them and assist in finding a therapist that they could meet and work with face to face.”

“ Yes, I perused your website and again, was looking for the “catch” .  I wondered how you would make a profit doing this on-line service, and thinking what’s the catch ? ”

“ And, Adam, you saw no catch did you ?”

“ No, I saw no ads to sell services or books….you are the real deal or you are crazy !”

“ Let’s just say, I want to give back and leave it at that.”

“Well Coach, as you have surmised, I married Ann’s sister and moved her away from that atmosphere. I cannot believe Meagan is gone and my wife feels if we were still living there, we could have somehow helped and protected Meagan. I knew something was amiss as I saw her mother begin to look sickly and give up her very active life with Meagan, and then what I observed at Meagan’s funeral gave me a visual memory I won’t soon forget. What a dysfunctional group of people. 

The time we were around, this child was filled with energy and enjoying partaking in her mother’s social life and concerts. They would dress alike and they were inseparable. Then, all of sudden, we could see Becky deteriorating, and we questioned whether she was ill.   Then, like overnight, her father took over raising Meagan. When we asked if something was wrong with Becky, Lucius would repeatedly say that his wife was not emotionally stable and suffered from depression, but he was taking control as a good husband and father would do. He would give you that cold look and tell us not to intrude in their family life.

I convinced my wife to move to another County. I just thought Lucius was bad news, but I had no idea how really dark and sick he was. Other attorneys were afraid of him, and I always suspected he had a couple judges in his vest pocket, so to speak. I suspect he had something on them. I did not want to work in that atmosphere.”

“ Well Adam, I think Lucius is a sociopath. By some of the warnings he sent to me, he seemed like a person who would dig up dirt on someone that allowed him to blackmail him or her, and to use and control them. He was, in my opinion, physically, emotionally and sexually abusing his wife. And Larry and Ann were terrified of him.

To that point, I want to know if you have looked over some of the evidence of abuse, bribery and threats he made as part of controlling Meagan’s life and see if we have any legal recourse. I have sent you my notes, the notes I received from Meagan about the sexual abuse, the signed notes from the Psychologist that Lucius set up and threatened so that she would claim that Meagan was just hysterical and that he, her father, never abused her, and the notes from one of Lucius’s clients whom he blackmailed in order to have her second therapist fired. I want your recommendations as to whether we as a group, a Support Team of Lucius’s victims, have any recourse legally. I also have DNA from the bed Meagan slept in while staying with Larry and Ann, in which Lucius often came and raped Meagan.”

“ May I ask how you came by some of this information ?”

“ The second therapist who was fired, whose name is Mary, happens to have an Uncle who is a retired Lieutenant from the Police Department and a Detective. He likes to be called Georgio, and he has been of immense help. 

Georgio interviewed  Mary’s boss, Mr. Julius, who was being blackmailed by Lucius.  Lucius threatened to expose him because he was gay, and having a sexual relationship with a male Grad Student at the same University that employed him. You will see from my notes that Lucius handled Mr. Julius’s divorce from, hold your breath, Dr. Olivia. I think that fact was in the notes I sent you.

He then interviewed Dr.Olivia, the Psychologist who treated Meagan as if she was hysterical and diagnosed her as PTSD, due to her Campus rape and she came clean about being blackmailed by Lucius to do his bidding. He was blackmailing her because of the affair she was having with a client, and some other issues that are included in my notes.

I called Ann to have her collect the sheets and Meagan’s pajamas from her room and I had that evience picked up by Lab Specialists, a  lab I have used before in my private practice for analysis. So we have that evidence to compare to her father’s semen. 

Larry and Ann knew that Lucius was coming into their home at night, and they heard her  screams for help but were ruled by fear and did not protect Meagan. She eventually stopped crying out for them.

I have the notes and letters that Meagan wrote but never sent asking him to stop the sex, at least thirty of them.  ”

“ Coach, I am a pretty stoic guy, but I feel sick hearing of all this. Well, I am and will continue to pour over this material, then analyze our options. So far,  hearing what you are saying, I believe Lucius could lose his Law License permanently. Then there are rape charges with Meagan for which we have  the supposed DNA, but no Meagan to  testify. But if I can get Ann and Larry to testify as to their awareness of Lucius sneaking into their home to have his way with his daughter, and then the bribery, we could be talking about significant prison time. It would ruin him financially.”

“ Coach, what is your hope for all this in the end ? “

“ I want to cut off his balls,  but if he loses his Law License and people hear the evidence, and serves time, he will be ‘damaged goods’, as he once told Meagan she was after she was raped on campus. I would like to see some of the attorneys and judges being blackmailed pass the word about Lucius to help defang this evil man, this sociopath.”

“ Whoa, you are really reaching, but I understand. “

“ I would hope you join forces with our Support Team of the Counselor Mary and her Uncle Georgio the Detective,  the Psychologist Dr. Olivia who called Meagan hysterical, Mr. Julius who fired Mary, and me. Maybe Ann can be part of this Support Group. I think the Support Group is needed because individually it is hard to go up against a sociopath, but as  group, we all know what is going on and can garner strength  from one another as a Team.”

“What about Larry, he is her Uncle ?”

“ He is too weak !”

“Alright Coach, let’s get started. I am on board. Tell the witnesses I will be in contact. Send me all you can and we will  see what damage we can do !”

My Letters to Dr. Olivia and Mr. Julius

Mr. Julius,

I am the Psychologist working with Lt. Georgio, the Detective who met with you recently. He has shared the information and the signed letter you gave him. 

Even though you fired Meagan’s therapist Mary, under false pretenses, she is willing to not expose your behavior if you actively work with Meagan’s Support Group and testify against the Attorney, Lucius B. 

Your relationship with the Grad Student and your sexual persuasion is of no interest to us, but we understand that Lucius had you under his thumb as you feared losing your job and very possibly your Counseling and Administrative License.

So, our Attorney, Adam, will be contacting you very soon. Your cooperation would be in your best interest as we do not believe that Lucius can beat the charges against him made by multiple witnesses.

If you have any questions for me, please respond, otherwise, expect a contact with the Group’s Attorney.

G.B. , Psychologist/Coach

Oh, how I enjoyed sending the following to Dr. Olivia !

Dr. Olivia,

I know you were told I would be contacting you regarding your testimony against the Attorney, Lucius B.

The charges against you are serious, and had a significant negative effect on Meagan, who has recently taken her own life. Lt. Georgio has shared your signed letter that you have agreed to work with the Support Group of witnesses that are working together on Meagan’s behalf. Our  interest is not that of seeing you lose your license, as we realize you were threatened and black-mailed by Lucius B., the Attorney, who is Meagan’s father. This, I would expect, has been a very emotional time for you. There is no interest on our part for filing a complaint against you with the Board of Psychology, under the circumstances, but we must defang the serpent, Lucius B.

The Support Group of witnesses has an Attorney, Adam, who will be calling for a meeting with you and the rest of the half-dozen witnesses soon.

You cannot live a life of fear being under the control of a sub-human like Lucius, so I hope you continue to cooperate.

G. B. Psychologist/ Coach 

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