When Fear Rules !

Stop Defending Yourself !

by on Sep.30, 2010, under Uncategorized

When you are attempting to say “no” or set boundaries with someone, make it a goal to not slip into the mode of defending yourself or your decisions. Just say, ” Sorry, I have other plans, maybe another time.” Do not compel yourself to have to give a dozen reasons or share your itinerary. Even if it is a parent, sibling or “close” friend, they need to respect your time and boundaries.

So many times, we adjust or change our plans to please others. Sometimes that is a great thing to do as you know the other person has done the same for you. That is what friends are for. But when  you recognize that the other person is one who tends to use you, take you for granted or in other ways does not respect your boundaries, you must learn to say NO, or take time to think about whether this is something you really want to do or might want to do but at another time, so as to not disrespect your own goals and to do list.

There are those people out there who just feel entitled, that take advantage, or try to use guilt to get your attention to their needs. Time to learn to set limits and boundaries.

Coach


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