I have brought up the issue of habits of behavior, I will call them compulsions, that we learn from childhood and I want to expand on that topic in response to questions I have received from members. Thank you all for your suggestions!!!
Obviously, our personalities are complex, and are effected by factors such as genetics and learned reactions to experiences that we have as totally dependent infants. We suck up the experiences, and form perceptions without any understanding or choice. We experience a huge range of emotion as we interact with our parents, our siblings, issues of family position, as in only child, first child, middle child, a child born with handicaps, etc. Somehow we survive but our ways of thinking, feeling and behaving are being formed second by second.
We each learn unique ways to see the world and learn to interact with that world which become habitual. Some become more aggressive, some more adapting and some more withdrawing based on their perceptions of the world. There are so many components and complexities to each personality, but for sure, how they see the world and deal with the world is almost set in stone as their pattern, their compulsions, are very resistant to change.
I am going to be offering a seminar in the near future to discuss each personality and their compulsions, but the very short version:
Aggressive Types feel more in control and are resistant to change.
The Adapting personalities are more aware of feelings and experience and are more aware of feeling conflicts as their needs are more often sacrificed in the name of seeking approval. However, from my experience with clients, they are able to learn and adapt to set boundaries and limits, but it takes practice and continued exercising meeting one’s needs in a healthy and balanced
The Withdrawing Types are very, very protective of their pretend and secure game plans and are very resistant to change.
Think about this overly simplified explanation, and ask questions.
Gene Benedetto/Psychologist Emeritus/ Coach